A pretty melodramatic title I must admit.
Dear reader, I am in a state of confusion. I do not know what these feelings that I am having are. No. I am not in love. Sheesh.
That is a lie. I have an idea of what I am feeling but I just too coward to admit it.
Well. I am going to take a step forward and start by writing and publishing it here.
As you all know, I am done with Honours. But that's the thing. I have been done since November. That is a whole THREE MONTHS doing almost NOTHING. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed. One part of me wants to tell people that I've been looking for a job. But the other part... which is the part I am not willing to embrace, feels embarrassed that up to this very moment, I have not gotten a job!
To be honest, now that I think about it. I am kind of regretful of doing Medical Science. It's a degree that does not guarantee you a job. If you do not like science and DO NOT see yourself doing research and living the rest of your life under uncertainty, then my suggestion is.. don't pursue that type of degree. I went into Honours, and dare I say it, half-hearted about science. I knew research was not my calling, but I went in because I was desperate to increase my GPA. Up until that point, I did not have flashy grades. That comes as no surprise seeing as I went into my Medical Science degree half-hearted. At the end of the year 12, I was still really depressed for not getting into undergraduate medicine and just went with the flow.
But in saying all that, I am trying to remain hopeful for the future. I am trying to remain steadfast on my goals. I just have to have absolute faith in Allah SWT, because He knows what is best for me.
Insha Allah I achieve my goals!
I have to go through the difficulties to make the ending sweeter right?
So that's my story of my quarter-life crisis. Melodramatic? Sure am, especially considering the fact that I've only just entered my 20s.
My eczema outbreak? Yeah... it usually happens when I am extremely stressed. Which I have been lately. But they've calmed down now that I have gotten some more sleep and applied sigmacort and elocon on my rashes.
Well, that's all for now folks. Hopefully will update some more with more positive news insha Allah!
Make doa for me guys! :D